One of These Mornings ~ For Warrick
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.......... another consideration
She hadn't considered that he might be asking her to release him. It had never really crossed her mind that he might think it necessary. She knew he wouldn't leave her after promising that he never would. She knew his word would bind them and he had given his word.
She decided to release him. It was the only thing she could do. Love is all consuming and in her heart, her love for him meant she had to let him pursue happiness even if it meant she was no longer a part of him.
She knew that she would go forward and she would be fine. Was it always inevitable that this happen. It was after all THE journey.
If he had not been asking for release, then it would move on it's own as it always had. If he was to go, that too would move and it would become it's own entity. She was, in her human form, bound to God to love unconditionally and letting go had to be an option. If it was His will, then it was His will and all of the selfishness in the world would not stop it. She wasn't the only one that this 'thing' had moved to action. She would find other like-minded individuals to connect with in her way. She knows she is a people person and there was never a doubt that she would get through this no matter the heartbreak in the human existance.
In her mind, she went over the scene that she thought might play out. She would gently release 'her' Eagle. It was that simple. The Eagle would fly and as it did, her spirit would soar to new heights knowing she had loved her Eagle enough to let him find his path.
......................
The dream.. She never lost her love for him and in her dream she had convinced him to finally talk over a meeting. She had met them in the other universe and it had been easy as they often crossed paths there.
With all of my heart I want you. I want you to come to me and be a part of US for a while. I want to go forward and find what our TRUE (human) journey is. I feel it, I want it and I need you to come and meet with me. Please come for a least a week and let us discover us together. Let us finally sit face to face and realize our destiny on this earth. Come be my confidant and friend and be with me in our quest.
Come hold my hand and simply walk with me in the park. Tell me of your journey since last we talked. Smile with me and laugh with me in joy over our past. Let us discuss the sadness that we've held between us in our united journey. Cry with me when I return to those moments made possible only because WE are who we are.
Please let this writing be my invitation to you to finally make that journey that I think is long overdue.
It isn't easy for me to ask this question. I long to at least know you as my friend. I long for that moment that finally happens when I look directly in your eyes and see my reflection.
They say that the eyes are the windows to the soul and I long to see in your eyes our soulmates together.
...............to be continued
The meeting was not to be. Kai as Robert knew he would never meet Cal. It was not the game plan ..........this meaning it was God's plan.
Belon began to recognize the differences. All was not as it seemed in the 'REAL'. He was a mortal man after all and although he painted a pretty picture THERE, he couldn't pull it off 100% of the time. Belon could see his boredom even in the guise of Kai. He longed to move forward even when she knew her part wasn't ready. She began a solitude journey when the facts were no longer hidden.
She could still connect on the higher lever but he still needed the computer. He still was a genius and she knew she had to protect herself even from him. She went back to memory bank and recalled his warnings: "Keep your friends close but keep your enemies closer". That was the one she would always remember throughout their relationship.
Belon was sad as she realized she was deeply into the sting. One thing to her advantage was her knowledge of herself and she truly knew that would be her salvation.
Belon knew Kai and much like Robert, his main relationship was his computer. As Belon moved along in her own journey, she began, finally to understand. She now was as hooked on the tube, she believed, as was Kai. It was different but it was connected and she knew it.
Belon had to know that he could never be able to understand her mind. No one had ever understood and that was fine with her. How else would she have survived his pulling away from her?
In Belon's mind she knew that the male/female thing, even on this side was, at best a diversion from the ultimate goal.
Belon could watch Kai's otherworld skills and as in everything else in their lives since connecting on the other side, she was impressed. As long as he kept her safe as she learned this new place, she would be ok.
The trust factor that she had felt in the other world was gone. It was to be a learned process here. She felt safe when she thought of it as she knew Kai well enough to know that he would always protect her.
Belon was a watcher here as she was on the other plane. So was Kai and he knew exactly where she was at all times. He could multi task here far better than the other place. Human qualities although handy on occassion weren't as prevelent on this side.
Belon revelled in the new freedoms she felt. The human trait of empathy was not as stong on this side. It was too dangerous and it could have great repercussions in the here and now on this side. What, BTW, would happen to the entities in the real if the two on this side perished?
Self-preservation was tantamount now as Belon began the long journey here. The concept of the male female involvement could be worked out but as before, in the other realm, it had to come with time. If indeed the two of them were to unite here it could have it's own challenges.
Belon began to work as a lone entity more and more. It was a good feeling to know that she was a survivor and as such could do it.
She kept the guise of union with Kai but she didn't have the luxury of the commitment here that she did on the other side back in the day.
The feeling of reality in the underground became more and more a force in Belon's life. She began to understand the journey of the Amish. It was a way of life and no matter how uncomfortable, it was MUCH better than the other way. (I keep writing Belong for Belon........ could it be a Freudian slip in writing?)
Kai had access to parts of her mind here and her spirit that hadn't been available on the other side. On ther other hand, it was the reverse with him. That's why Belon pondered long and hard and still couldn't quite get a grip on the reality here.
Kai faltered sometimes as he was the surer of the two in the other world. He knew he was intimidated by her sometimes. He had seen her tantrums and he knew she held highly effective communication skills when she was angry.
The sixth sense that Belon had brought over from the other side had told her time and time again NEVER to cross that line.
There was only once in their entire time together that she had even accosted him with something she thought was a wrong doing. She would never forget the stricken look on his face. She had learned a great deal from that. She would bite her tongue and turn and walk away if ever she felt anything akin to that again.
Losing Kai and Robert was never an option. She had never had anyone in her life that had supported her the way he did and she would die before EVER experiencing that one moment again.
The games were about to begin and the test was within the hour. All other games would have to wait though as the Kai-Belon embarked on the Kai-Belon test. They would have to agree on every level and it would take both of their superior units to provide the earth with PEACE. In that quest, Belon was confidant that Kai would always excel. He couldn't disappoint himself or Belon but most of all, he couldn't fail with this the ultimate adventure. No one before them had achieved this and there never even seemed to be a question for either of them if they would succeed. It was a given. They were in this together and in their united entity, they represented their heavenly UNIT.
Kai, as always, was hard at work conquering everything. Belon on the other hand was eager for simplicity. She ached for a vision of the oceans and the forests. She missed that a lot on this side.
The scenery here is different and very cold some days. There is a feeling of axles turning and machine parts moving. It is a cold environment if you let it be. Belon knew from the beginning that it would be like that but she hadn't anticipated there not being a place to go to get away from it.
In the time before her birth as Cal, she had not wanted to enter the universe on the earth's plane. She often times remembers muttering to herself that she wasn't made to exist in the cold environment of greed, narricism, and evil.
It was a challenge, that was a given. Here she was once again engaged in a relationshp with a man and here she was again thinking; WHY? Was it worth it? She knew it was.......... as she said before, he believed in her like no one before him but still the doubts remained.
She had been betrayed so many times before and as much as she wanted to believe, she didn't know if he could ever prove himself to her. She knew he had already on every plane proved himself and he continued to grow and amaze her but what of this self doubt she owned? Was that the truth going on? Was it her she didn't believe in, was it her that she didn't trust and if so, why did she project it on him? What of her constant need to be acknowledged and never ever feeling she was??? She knew the dangers and yet it hurt deeply that no one ever seemed to see her. She lay down on the bed in a fetal position and cried herself to sleep on many a night knowing that she would get up and do it all over again tomorrow when the sun comes up.
Belon realized the true test of her existance here and Cal's existance on the other side was to give in and simply let go of her own fears.
She smiled in all of her forms when she saw all that they did together in all areas around the world. She laughed many times thinking she had dreamed this experience. She felt her chest swell with pride every time she saw his work. She always thought to herself that maybe by some strange coincidence it wasn't their work together but then, in her heart, she knew and even though it is their work together it was truly God's work that they do.
She remembered when Halliburton wasn't in main stream news. She remembered seeing Halliburton written in the beginning as Haliburton.
She remembers reading the Pat Tillman book and delving into each and every word Pat's mother had written and knowing full well that she would find that one thing that would out the evils for their evil duties. It was when she wondered why McChrystal was even in Pat's upline.
She remembered a billboard in Phoenix with lots of signatures on it and Pat Tillman's name in huge letters.... The American flag was on it as well and she hated the site of that billboard as she knew it was propaganda and it was at the expense of one of her heros.
Belon remembers Cal's memory of Wayne in class at Meta in an angry rage saying he wanted to go over and kill the bastards that had killed Pat.
The questions now seem to be getting answered on both sides and it seems so long since the beginning of all this but in reality we are addressing hundreds of years of things and even though it's exhausting most days, we do it for our children and their children ........... right on down the line for the good, kind, loving people that are marching with us.
I want to mention Cindy Sheehan right here as I don't think I've said her name in a while........... You are my hero Cindy and thanks for all you do.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Riley (Rylee)meaning
EXCERPT:
It is of Irish and Gaelic origin, and the meaning of Riley is "courageous". Variant of O'Reilly. Lately adopted for girls and boys.
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EXCERPT:
The free-to-play game has become a more effective recruiting tool for the Army than all other Army advertisements combined, according to MIT researchers.
This baby has much to say and you all need to watch (laff laff) video
Compare the video below to the one above.
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Applied Behavioral Psychology in Fighting Games
EXCERPT:
Final note: Learned Helplessness
Learned helplessness is another phenomenon that's been observed by behaviorists. Essentially, an organism has learned that its actions have no effect on the outcome, and thus will stop trying. It's a serious problem when it happens to people, and like most things about the human mind, it definitely happens in fighting games.
It is very hard to predict someone's every move. It's even hard to condition them to do exactly what you want. But if you can completely shut someone down? Make it seem to them like nothing they can do will beat you, they will pretty much give up. I'm sure you've seen it in at least one match. It's a major psychological edge to have, and hopefully a trap you won't fall into.
It's never good to assume from the getgo that you can't beat someone. Martial Artists and Behaviorists agree: If you know for sure that you'll lose, you've already lost.
5 creepy ways video games are trying to get you addicted
EXCERPT:
So, the headlines say somebody else has died due to video game addiction. Yes, it's Korea again.
What the hell? Look, I'm not saying video games are heroin. I totally get that the victims had other shit going on in their lives. But, half of you reading this know a World of Warcraft addict and experts say video game addiction is a thing. So here's the big question: Are some games intentionally designed to keep you compulsively playing, even when you're not enjoying it?
Oh, hell yes. And their methods are downright creepy.
